Gaining some parenting confidence

Friday, 11 December 2015
Becoming a parent, whether a mother or father, is a massive life changing event which is hard. I felt having a child, or two would come naturally and be quite simple sailing - but how wrong was I? Working in childcare I thought I'd seen a lot of the behind the scenes, but there is a lot more too it. 

I had no idea the changes this little person was going to make to my life, yes I knew there would be some - but I didn't know the effects it would have on my confidence. 

It seems with this I'm not alone, a survey commissioned by Nurofen for Children of 2,000 mums shows it takes on average around six months to feel confident as a parent and around half worry about their babies health. 

Even during my pregnancy with Jack I worried about everything, with the reoccurance of reduced fetal movements the worry began. Then in the first few months I felt I didn't know how to cope with each cry, each sniffle, I worried about his sleep, his feeding, his reflux, his immunisations; I was constantly worried even when I needn't be. 
Whenever I went somewhere people would ask how the baby is, how I'm coping and everyone wanted to give me lots of advice I would find useful and it differentiated between each person. But in the end I learnt to trust my own instinct, trust what I thought to be right as at the end of the day it was my baby and I needing to live with these things. 

My big parenting confidence milestones are getting through the teething stage, what a crazy journey that it. But also when we managed to get through our horrible reflux/milk intolerance journey it was a hard journey and that helped boost my confidence a lot. 

Yes of course I tried some of the advice I was given by these people, I even took to the internet for advice but deep down I trusted my instincts. 

When I found out I was pregnant with Isla, I felt a bit more relaxed and confident about the journey. However there have been lots of other things I have doubted this time - especially with breastfeeding. This time I had more of confidence issues with parenting two children which is a whole other game. But I feel we have coped well along the journey. I choose not to give advice to other parents unless they ask along the way - my only advice now is to trust your instincts, you know your baby best and know what will make them happy.

What helps you feel confident as a parent?

I am a member of the Mumsnet Bloggers Network Research Panel, a group of parent bloggers who have volunteered to blog about a specified subject or review products, services, events and brands for Mumsnet. I have editorial control and retain full editorial integrity. I have been entered into a prize draw to win a £100 voucher as a token of thanks for this post. 

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